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Mid-term election day is Tuesday, tomorrow. As an American, it’s a privilege. As an election judge, it’s a long day. I also know our elections and systems are true and trustworthy. Of course, I say that from a suburban location.

Regardless, I do think 99.9 percent of elections are true. The outcome may or may n0t be one I voted for or support. However, I believe in the power of voting and elections.

One great other thing about election day: no more political ads! Leading up to election day, the ads have been everywhere and non-stop. You watch any live TV, like we do, the commercials have multiple political ads, f0r, against and everything in between. I’m glad all it ends with election day.

Voting truly is a privilege for us as American citizens. Be sure to vote!

Wow. With only two months left this year, It’s time to take stock on where I am now. It’s the perfect time to check in on my goals and my three words for 2026.

First, my goals.

• Finish my book. Underway. I want to finish it in the first quarter or so this year. This one is on surviving toxic family systems. I’m also starting a book on what it means to drive effective communications in organizations today. Update: Need to revisit all of this. I’m on board with it, I just need to recommit.
• Take the right supplements for my health and fitness. I’ve decided what’s right for me and have started to take them. Update: I’m taking my prescriptions and the supplements I’ve chosen as right for me.
• Consider a career pivot to grant writing – I’m still thinking about this. I’m not quite sure it’s for me yet. Update: This is not for me right now. I’ve got other writing to focus on. See above and books.

Then, here are my three words for the year as a reminder to me:

• Ease: Defined as to be calm and relaxed.
• Peace. This is about also about calmness, quiet and inner focus.
• Purpose. For me, this means a life well-lived and aligned with my values and how I can make a difference. 

These words are still aligned for me, which is wonderful. Soon, I’ll start thinking of my new words for 2027. I’ll also start to work on my goals for new new year. Some will be the same, some will be new. That’s how I can  stay consistent and grow, too. Is’t that what it’s about after all?

The job application system is beyond broken. LinkedIn has so many posts about it. I know I’m not unique here.

Here is an example: I applied for a role I was more than qualified for and then some. Here’s what happened. I was sent one of those so grateful-for-applying mumbojumbo craptastic auto-reply-thank-you-so-much-rejections. I should be done applying for roles I could do in my sleep.

Another example: I had applied for a role and an HR person reached out about it and asked me t0 use a calendar link to schedule something with her, which I did. It was for a role at a company I used to work at earlier in my career. Then, within 24 hours and in the middle of the night, I got a rejection for that very role we were going to discuss. I sent that to the HR person with direct feedback. I won’t be treated that way. I cancelled the meeting with her. It was a waste of my time.

I’ve had a few conversations with companies. Whether it’s an HR person or a hiring manager, more of these conversations are happening “in person” via Teams. I like that, except when I then get a rejection. I expect a personal outreach with a rejection before the standard rejection email. When the personal connection doesn’t happen, I give that feedback.

I am beyond being treated like an after thought after “meeting.” It’s a boundary for me. I will not be treated like I am not human.

What do I need to do to be noticed as a communications expert, especially employee communications and change management?

Maybe this means than I’m better than these roles. Perhaps it means it’s not me, it’s them. Actually, I know this.

I do question if it’s ageism. I haven’t colored my hair for years, so it’s a natural color – gray. The increased Teams meetings makes my hair color, and age, obvious. Maybe I should get a darker wig and wear it during Teams interviews.

Companies: Do better. Treat candidates like humans and be kind. It doesn’t take a lot. And fix your processes. Arranging a time to meet and then getting a rejection is unacceptable, pure and simple. Respect an individual’s time. Try to be human yourself, that’s feedback specifically for HR types and company leadership. And do not discriminate against my age and gray hair. It’s wrong. Again, do better.

I’ve posted, and over shared here, about my toxic biological family. I have a new person to add to the toxic group: an uncle wh0 is a brother 0f my biological mother. I really think these “adults” need to grow up.

Toxic family systems are dysfunctional environments where harmful behaviors, emotional neglect and unhealthy patterns shape self-perception, relationships and emotional well-being. Some characteristics of toxic families often include exhibiting persistent dysfunction, including manipulation, criticism and unrealistic expectations.

And, wow, did that happen recently as I was trying to find time to see an out-of-state uncle who was in town. Based on our plans to be elsewhere, I didn’t have a lot of time to try to see him. (This led to a comedy of errors, which made me think I was stupid to try to make this happen.)

All humor aside, it’s why managing the effects of a toxic family system is about finding ways to cope and heal by recognizing toxic patterns and setting boundaries.

For me, I limit exposure to harmful behaviors and toxic people. This protects my mental health. For me, this is about boundaries and h0w I will and will not allow others to treat me. I don’t care who you are. Don’t treat me like crap. I won’t allow it.

I won’t take this abuse, nor do I want to be a part of toxicity on this level, biological family or not. My peace is too important to me.

Ok, bye bye…..

Fall weather in Minnesota is stupendous! The leaves are changing and clothes get cozier.

I think I love fall so much because my birthday is in the fall. In fact, it’s a milestone each year (besides the birthday milestone) because it’s about when leaves start changing in earnest.

I went for a walk today and noticed how the trees are changing. As I continue to walk daily, I’ll notice the transition. It’s fun!

Cozy clothes are my jam. I love fuzzy socks and warm blankets and slippers. I’m a sweat shirt and sweat pants kind of girl. So this season is meant for me.

It’s also time for warm fires in the fireplace and the crackling and glow and warmth. There’s something about it.

These are all part of my love affair with fall!

Often, people like to hear themselves speak. When talking to someone else, it’s common to be thinking, as they are speaking, how to make it about you and respond. Instead, what I’m proposing is to be truly interested in other people and ask them questions about what they may be discussing or interested in themselves.

Think about that for a moment. To ask questions of someone instead of being ready to respond with information about yourself is focused on the other person. It’s giving your full attention when spoken t0.

Do n0t “one up” another’s story. Ask questions. Sh0w the respect you would also expect. It’s a bit of the Golden Rule.

Also part of the Golden Rule is gossip. Part of being interested in someone is avoiding gossip whenever possible. After all, if someone is going to talk about someone else, they are most likely talking about you, too.

Similarly, if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. This may seem cliche but it’s true.

That’s why time always exposes what you mean to someone. This is really something I’m going to focus on. I want to give time and attention, especially for those who mean something to me.

Additionally, I’m going to really try to be as positive as possible. People like being around those wh0 are positive and smile and don’t make everything about themselves.

My birthday is this week on Sept. 25. Each birthday is precious, especially as I get older. With this birthday, I’m now older than 55.

Even with that age, I count myself lucky that I’m mobile. I walk more than three miles almost every day, weather permitting. For as long as I can, I’m going to be active and keep moving. I don’t want to be like some people a few years older than Rob and me who have a hard time walking. That won’t be us. I’m determined.

Activity has so many benefits both physical and mental. It’s why I do it.

My birthday is a reminder to be grateful for my life as it is today. I continue to be focused on moving forward every day with love and thanksgiving.

My Catholic faith is one of the elements of who I am that came from my biological parents that I’m grateful about. Yes, I said it. I’m typically proud to be a Catholic. I raised my daughter in the faith. I share it with my husband.

However, especially recently, I have a very complicated relationship with my faith, and I have various reasons for it.

First, hypocrisy. Some priests preach victimhood. They preach values contrary to mine. I cannot even attend a mass by these types of priests.

Additionally, I applied for two roles with local parishes for communications roles. During the processes, I was treated as a side concern by one and had my communications experience nearly overlooked by another. Both parishes seemed to think they were better than others. I would not want to be part of such  Catholic organizations. (They eventually hired individuals wh0 have n0 where near my experience.)

Rob and I went to the same Catholic university. The alumni association is full of long-time board members who are power hungry and drink the school kool-aid. One person (a former president of the board) attacked me during a virtual meeting as I was stepping up to volunteer for a board role. After that, defending myself and Rob defending me, led to the board trying to tell us h0w to behave. All this after we had volunteered for decades with the organization. The issue was elevated (by us) t0 the alumni association and then, to the university’s general counsel. Again, a reason my relationship with my faith is challenging.

Individuals who claim to be Catholic are n0t representatives of the faith in my opinion.

When my biological father died, my biological sisters acted like they were the best Catholics, including one who wears a head covering like pre-Vatican Two. My entire biological family thinks they are the best Catholics. Being showy and holier-than-thou-Catholics is not part my faith.

From those Catholics who don’t act like Catholics to priests who actually tear down the faith instead of building it up, I have a very complicated relationship with my faith. And I’m ok saying so. Being a real Catholic is who I am.

Nothing in life is perfect. No one person is perfect. When someone feels broken, there is something that represents the healing. I know this personally. Japan’s ancient art of embracing imperfection or kintsugi represents this.

I can hardly believe it’s the end  of August and beginning of September (my birthday month!). August is about growth and sunshine.

Our plantings are now growing after months of heat. I love this time of year for plant growth. I’m nearly ready to pull peppers and tomatoes, the rhubarb has been ready since spring!

It’s also a great time to sit outside or go for a walk and enjoy the sun.  It’s good for vitamin D. I’m a believer in sunscreen so it makes it fine to be outside. I put sunscreen on when I’m going for one of my long outdoor walks.

I’ve been taking advantage of the weather to walk outside instead of in the gym. It’s waiting for me in the winter or cold months after all. Why do that now when the birds and sun beacon?

Rob and I love to drink coffee or adult beverages outside on these warm days.

I try to take advantage of being outside since the summer and warm seasons are shorter in Minnesota compared to cold and winter months.